Slow Living and Writing Tuesday
Oct. 21st, 2025 04:28 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
k_sereinroomA Tuesday, with the elevator out of working order for eight hours for “exciting upgrades”.
I didn’t want to go out anyway, although I’ve just now got back from the closest donut shop where I had an apple fritter, and a real drip coffee to which I added half and half, instead of the decaf Americano with oat milk. This is unsustainable for me, health-wise and financially, yet I’m wary of staying in isolation for long periods of time. It is too chilly to sit on the bench in front of the building. In a couple of months this weather will seem balmy.
My day got hijacked early on by something I saw online. I write a newsletter on Substack, published once a week. I’ve written 37 of them so far, and have four subscribers besides myself. I can count on one hand the number of likes and comments I’ve received. That’s all I’m going to say about that.
Anyway, this rich, old, successful guy who is now retired, has been posting a lot. It’s a new activity for him, he’s using AI, and encouraging other retired people to look into it to share their expertise and make a little money. No one is perfect, and I can see something to object to in almost everything I read. He seems to have one mission regarding his newsletter, and since I got his point a few weeks ago, it has been repetitive, and I feel whacked over the head with it.
But that is what he’s offering. He isn’t writing for what people expect. So there were criticisms in the comments, much of it was about him not being human. He thoughtfully answered some of the critics. I see him as offering a service that will be of help to some people. I wouldn’t take any other life advice from him. And I’m glad he isn’t using AI to create content in other areas and making himself out to be an expert. Anyway, it got my mind engaged, and I didn’t feel like being a bystander, so I wrote a long and honest comment, which by now everyone has ignored.
Substack might not be as bad as other sites, but it’s still no stroll through a peaceful woodland.
I had a Zoom training at noon, so I set my timer for two hours and did a little catch up in apartment maintenance. I am limping badly and have poor motivation. I got dishes done, hung up clothes that were draped over the settee, and made brunch.
The Zoom training was difficult to focus on, as usual, but titration, titration, titration. Or in another way to put it, calibration in creating more capacity.
I have a high ACE score – Adverse Childhood Experiences. I have early developmental trauma, many shock traumas, and decades of survival stress. My main survival tools have been a reasonable level of literacy, and a great curiosity. Most of the best information I have, was received from age 63 onward. I am now 71.
The program is called Smart Body, Smart Mind. It was created by Irene Lyon, and she has many free resources on her blog and YouTube channel. Once purchased, the course can be taken repeatedly. This is my fourth round, and I take in and do the practices as much as I safely can.
Being 71 years of age, feeling cheated about decades of suffering, it is easy to fall into a panic about running out of time, and to push myself too hard and too fast.
My complex post traumatic stress is a companion, not my identity. And it’s intersectional with many other things. I make sense of my life through systems, looking at things through lenses like Human Design, Gene Keys and being an INFJ. ( I haven’t looked at the other types in the MBTI, because by now I clearly am aware that few will ever listen to my perceptions, and I’m cultivating the art of selfishness when I remember. )
After the training call, I should have got up to move my body more, but I worked on a draft for my Friday newsletter. I enjoy writing, and while I am not really a tech lover, it feels safer to type things online than write in a notebook, which I do also.
I didn’t want to go out anyway, although I’ve just now got back from the closest donut shop where I had an apple fritter, and a real drip coffee to which I added half and half, instead of the decaf Americano with oat milk. This is unsustainable for me, health-wise and financially, yet I’m wary of staying in isolation for long periods of time. It is too chilly to sit on the bench in front of the building. In a couple of months this weather will seem balmy.
My day got hijacked early on by something I saw online. I write a newsletter on Substack, published once a week. I’ve written 37 of them so far, and have four subscribers besides myself. I can count on one hand the number of likes and comments I’ve received. That’s all I’m going to say about that.
Anyway, this rich, old, successful guy who is now retired, has been posting a lot. It’s a new activity for him, he’s using AI, and encouraging other retired people to look into it to share their expertise and make a little money. No one is perfect, and I can see something to object to in almost everything I read. He seems to have one mission regarding his newsletter, and since I got his point a few weeks ago, it has been repetitive, and I feel whacked over the head with it.
But that is what he’s offering. He isn’t writing for what people expect. So there were criticisms in the comments, much of it was about him not being human. He thoughtfully answered some of the critics. I see him as offering a service that will be of help to some people. I wouldn’t take any other life advice from him. And I’m glad he isn’t using AI to create content in other areas and making himself out to be an expert. Anyway, it got my mind engaged, and I didn’t feel like being a bystander, so I wrote a long and honest comment, which by now everyone has ignored.
Substack might not be as bad as other sites, but it’s still no stroll through a peaceful woodland.
I had a Zoom training at noon, so I set my timer for two hours and did a little catch up in apartment maintenance. I am limping badly and have poor motivation. I got dishes done, hung up clothes that were draped over the settee, and made brunch.
The Zoom training was difficult to focus on, as usual, but titration, titration, titration. Or in another way to put it, calibration in creating more capacity.
I have a high ACE score – Adverse Childhood Experiences. I have early developmental trauma, many shock traumas, and decades of survival stress. My main survival tools have been a reasonable level of literacy, and a great curiosity. Most of the best information I have, was received from age 63 onward. I am now 71.
The program is called Smart Body, Smart Mind. It was created by Irene Lyon, and she has many free resources on her blog and YouTube channel. Once purchased, the course can be taken repeatedly. This is my fourth round, and I take in and do the practices as much as I safely can.
Being 71 years of age, feeling cheated about decades of suffering, it is easy to fall into a panic about running out of time, and to push myself too hard and too fast.
My complex post traumatic stress is a companion, not my identity. And it’s intersectional with many other things. I make sense of my life through systems, looking at things through lenses like Human Design, Gene Keys and being an INFJ. ( I haven’t looked at the other types in the MBTI, because by now I clearly am aware that few will ever listen to my perceptions, and I’m cultivating the art of selfishness when I remember. )
After the training call, I should have got up to move my body more, but I worked on a draft for my Friday newsletter. I enjoy writing, and while I am not really a tech lover, it feels safer to type things online than write in a notebook, which I do also.
